Monday, August 20, 2007

Split Mind, Partial Results
I have been coaching a client through the emotional part of buying her first home, late in life. She now has definite parameters for what she can spend, and what would be smart to have as features of the condo she needs: an extra room and bath in case she needs to take on a roommate, for example. But originally, she didn't know her financial limits, wasn't sure what she wanted in terms of features, didn't want to upset her strong-minded and rather impatient real estate agent, and was dealing with the sheer courage it was taking to take this "risk" at her age.
So even in this buyer's market, she was finding surprising setbacks. The condos were in poor condition, too small, or the owners wanted all sorts of contingencies — some of them couldn't find new places to move to so she couldn't move into the place she was bidding on. Her agent was bossing her around and pressuring her to get done with it, already. Over the last few weeks, she's been getting clearer about her own boundaries — what she will accept, what her agent is supposed to be doing for her, what's simply too expensive and unrealistic for her. She is learning to unify herself in her own sense of "deep comfort," and the house-hunting process is narrowing and looks like it's progressing into clarity. This is one situation where the connection between inner state of mind and outer results seemed so directly correlated, that it impressed me, and reminded me to look into my own life for places I don't feel entitled to something, or hold too much humility and adaptability, or am conflicted about what I want. I heard myself say to another client in a reading today: "Entitlement is really about being centered." When we're centered, present, and saturated with our own soul energy, we become super-magnetic for that which we need.